Archive | January, 2014

Does NY Rep. Michael Grimm Have Masculine Identity Issues?

30 Jan

In case you’ve been living under a rock and haven’t heard about it… the above clip is of Rep. Michael Grimm, a Republican Congressman representing Staten Island and parts of Brooklyn who is currently under investigation for illegal fund raising being interviewed by NY1 reporter Michael Scotto.  Grimm is being interviewed to get his response to the President’s State of the Union address, but the reporter decides to throw in a last minute question about the investigation.  And hilarity ensues.  You see what happens, Grimm walks off then comes back to threaten bodily harm to Scotto.

Well we see Grimm’s true colors, and they are a lovely hue of douche.  In trying to avoid shame, he fully created it.

This proves my theory that if you leave people to their own devices, their true colors will show.  What’s that old saying?  “Give ’em enough rope… to hang themselves”  People eventually rat themselves out.

That’s why I love Judge Judy and the People’s Court.  Judge Judy and Judge Milian, tend to ask people very short questions and let them trip themselves all up.  Also if one person claims another has a temper or is a liar, the judges ask just the right questions for the lies and temper to come out… and voila’, you’ve just proven the case.

My theory is if you are trying to get the truth out of someone… just let them talk.  Don’t accuse and yell, they’ll just throw it back on you and somehow make themselves the victim, or it will give them enough time to come up with some good bullshit.  Throw in a logistical question that might cause backtracking and then just listen.  It’s entertaining to see the fireworks when people get backed into a corner.

Rep. Grimm got backed into a corner and his response was flight and fight.  First he flew (walked away) then he came back ready to start fightin’.  A person with integrity, would calmly say “I’m not talking about it, thank you” or come back to apologize for walking off in a huff.  But this douchetractor comes back threatening bodily harm.  Not just any bodily harm, but mafioso-type thuggery.

And the whole “You’re not man enough” stuff, what’s that all about?  Somebody has masculine pride issues, perhaps it’ll come out he has sexuality or gender issues too?  No, no that’s not nice of me to say.  But I do find it odd, the whole “man enough” thing.  What the hell does that have to do with anything?  Well being ex-military, maybe all insults lead to a dig at your manly abilities?  Do I detect a bit of self-loathing that he has failed as a “man”?  Maybe some girl once told him he had a small schmeckel or his Dad said he wasn’t much of a man?  Who the hell knows?  Just an odd thing to say, and a little telling.

Grimm offered two “apologies”.  The first that night gave all kinds of excuses saying Scotto was the antagonist.  Then the next day he says “Maybe I shouldn’t have done that”.  Oy.

My final point from this is… you are always, ALWAYS responsible for your actions.  People tend to think “I snapped” is an excuse.  It’s not, you still have a choice in that moment to control yourself.  People say “I lost control”… no you didn’t, you took control.  You felt you were at a disadvantage in a situation so you are taking “control” of the situation by manhandling it or verbally attacking it.  Get it?  A sane person would say to themselves, “You know what, this isn’t going the way I want, I’m just going to step back”.  Don’t give me that “I lost my temper”, “It was the heat of the moment” crap, that’s never ever an excuse.  You always have control and you are always responsible.  Period.

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A Look at the Ugliest USA Olympic Opening Ceremony Outfits Ever

23 Jan

So today the new outfits that the 2014 USA Olympic Team will don in the opening ceremonies were revealed.

2014 olympics

Ralph Lauren has done it again.  Part of me kind of likes it in a funky way.  The leggings and boots.  Somehow I knew there would be leggings this year.  But that ugly ass sweater?  Is that what someone found while digging through racks at Goodwill looking for an ugly Christmas sweater?

And it reminds me of these 2 shitty jackets from Wilson Leather in the early 90’s, that by wearing it got you a first class ticket to Loserville…

USA jacket world flags

Couple those with a pair of MC Hammer pants from Merry Go Round or Chess King and you were stylin’!  (Young folks you may want to Google those, they were old cheesy men’s clothing stores that were staples in every mall in the 70s and 80s)

So it prompted me to look up some of the more hideous Olympic Opening Ceremony outfits of the past…

2004 olympics

2004 Olympics in Athens

What the hell inspired this design?  “Hey let’s see what the kids on Nickelodeon are wearing?”

1988 Olympics

1988 Olympics in Seoul

Perhaps they got the wrong “soul”, just add a gold rope chain, Kangol hat and boombox…

1984 Olympics

1984 Olympics in Los Angeles

Such a trendy place, that L.A.  I would have thought they’d come up with something more fashionable  than a Burger King employee uniform…

Burger king

1928 olympics

1928 Olympics in Amersterdam

I guess they stuck with the laid back drug adled theme of Amersterdam and went with a Bathrobe/lab coat style.

1972 olympics

1972 Olympics in Munich

Let’s face it, everything in 1972 was that ugly.

1968-olympics

1968 Olympics in Mexico City

This badass team had soul.  Solid!  Coincidentally the singing group “Color Me Bad” would try to resurrect this look later but it looked a little more… jive-ass.

color me bad

2012-olympics

2012 Olympics in London

This is some flight-attendant-meets-Symbionese-Liberation-Army bullshit.  I say pip pip cheerio to those uniforms…

Patty_Hearst

1984 winter olympics

1984 Olympics in Sarajevo

The sign in front says it all.  Yea, I know “Dallas” had been popular on TV for a few years but give me a break with the hokiness.

1996 olympics

1996 Olympics in Atlanta

Modeled after the Von Trapp Family, apparently…

1976 olympics

1976 Olympics in Innsbruck

Equipped with drool bib.  Or for others seeking a hand towel.

Why can’t all Olympic opening ceremony outfits look like they did in 1930’s-1950’s

1948 olympics

Classic and timeless.  But then if they were I guess I’d have nothing to write about, correct?  And the opening ceremonies wouldn’t be a ratings boosting comical spectacle of bad fashion and instead would be more of a dignified walk to honor competing athletes and their nations. would they?

Good luck to all those competing in Sochi in 2014 in 2 weeks.  Let’s hope Putin doesn’t F it up and have another 1972 Munich games on his hands.   God forbid.

The Year of Madge with Video Footage

16 Jan

Do you guys remember the episode of Seinfeld (if you say you’ve never seen it or don’t know what it is, you should probably just leave my blog now… ok just kidding, kind of) where George decided it was the “Summer of George”?

Well, I proclaim this to be the “Year of Madge”!  Ok ok, I know I proclaimed it in like 2006… which wasn’t too bad of a year, but I really mean it this time.  Things are going to go my way God damn it, if I have to take all of you down with me!   I feel I have turned a corner.  I am getting a whole crap load of opportunities.  I have another article in Rochester Woman in Feb.  And I have a feature article written by me, about my experiences with mid-life dating and my book coming out in the magazine that comes in the Sunday edition of Rochester Democrat and Chronicle.  Circulation, close to 200,000… I’ll take that bit of extra marketing, thanks!  They just asked me to set up a photo shoot for it… how obnoxious can I be for that one, huh?

I was asked by Amazon to submit something for Kindle Singles.  On top of that I have several other projects I’m working on, so I’m incredibly busy and blessed.  Let’s see if this can last the whole year and not shit the bed on me, mkay?

So, besides that just wanted to let you in on my newest obsession… Vines.  You can download the Vine app onto your phone and shoot 3 second videos.  It’s quite the popular thing with the kids these days.  Check out Vine.co.  Here is a little compilation from YouTube…

And here of course are some gems that I made…

http://vine.co/v/hLleMeg6g0E 

https://vine.co/v/hLHUKeH7LEK 

Let me see your Vines!  If you have an account, tell me your username so I can follow you!  My handle of course is Madge Madigan.

Your Vagina is Not a Tote Bag

9 Jan

‘Vaginal Knitting’ Is Here To Make Everyone Afraid Of Performance Art Once Again (NSFW)

Read Article Here

So, um… yea… ew.

Who… I mean what… like why would you… who are these people that do things like this?

I’m all for expressing yourself, I’m in some ways an “artist”, I have tons of artist friends.  I was a punk rock kid, always dressed that way and listened to the music I like.  But some stuff I just don’t get.  Well, ya’ know though… do what you want, who am I to say?  Go on with yer bad self.

Then I see this…

Jennifer McCarthy Pulls Gun From Vagina After Dispute Over Space Aliens: Cops

Read Article Here

That’s all kinds of Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.  Before that, over the years I’ve read the occasional article of women smuggling drugs into other countries or into jails in their vaginas.  Other items smuggled into jail through the love canal… cell phones, switchblade, shivs, credit cards, cigarettes, crack pipe.  I don’t know about you ladies, but all of those things make me cringe.  However dudes, have been smuggling things into prison or elsewhere in their tukus for decades.  I don’t know what would be more uncomfortable, my front or back storage compartment.  Either way, right now I am simultaneously  clenching both of those areas.

I can tell you I’ve never been in jail or prison or had a loved one in jail or prison, so I don’t know how desperate things are in there. Also I have never planned to kill anyone and needed a concealed weapon… like REALLY concealed.  And I’m just not into arts and crafts either.  All I know is that there are only certain things that belong in my lady parts, I’m sure everyone’s list varies just a bit.  But I do know guns and balls of yarn aren’t on my list.  It was bad enough three 8 1/2 lb babies passed through there… I’ve no desire for any other spelunking going on in there… unless it fits painlessly and conveniently into the compartment.

What you do on your own time is your business… however if it contains consumer goods in your cooch, I don’t want to know.  God bless.

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