I’ve got a lot of things going on right now that I’m trying really really really hard to listen to the Universe so it can tell me what the hell to do. Remember that blog I wrote about listening for cues? Listen to Where You’re Being Sent. Yea, I’m about to invest in a f*#kin’ hearing aid! I’m at some crossroads, traffic is coming up behind me, I need to (as my feisty Irish Mother used to say) “Shit or get off the pot”.
Anyway, while listening for cues, or like the old Robert Palmer song “Looking for Clues” (sorry I have ADD today) I was blessed with a bit of perspective today…
I was driving through the city and had a convertible Porsche behind me most of the way. I thought to myself “Damn wouldn’t that be nice?”, in my bout of car/wealth envy. It turns out the Porsche and I had the same destination… Wegmans. For those who don’t know, Wegmans is the regional chain of supermarkets that is ranked like best in the world or something. Seriously, the store has like… cult-like status. Anway, the car parked right next to me and we got out at the same time. It was a fit woman probably late 30′s/early 40′s long dark hair, designer sunglasses, a polo shirt, and I think a golf skirt and a sweet looking young girl in shorts and a sleeveless blouse with blonde hair neatly pulled back.
The woman approached me with a big smile on her face and said, “We’ve been admiring the back of your car for the whole ride, envying your stickers”, as she pointed to the stickers on the back window of my car. On the back of my car I have a McQuaid sticker, which is a local all boys Catholic School that my son went to, it’s highly regarded for it’s academics. Also an Our Lady of Mercy HS sticker which is the girl’s equivalent of McQuaid that my girls attend. Both require an entrance exam. And I have an NYU sticker.
The woman pointed to each sticker and said, “My daughter will be going to Mercy next year, and my son hopes to go to McQuaid some day, and my daughter’s dream is to eventually go to NYU”. I smiled ear to ear and told her that was so wonderful and that my son who went to McQ now goes to NYU, and I have 2 girls at Mercy. I asked the young lady what grade she would be going into and she said 7th. I replied, ” Oh my girls will be in 10th and 12th grade and have been there since 7th, they absolutely love it, so will you”. The girl flashed a big smile and the Mother said, “Oh yes she’s very excited” and the girl added, “I can’t wait!”.
The Mother introduced herself and I told her to look for my girls. She again mentioned the dream of NYU and I pointed at the stickers and said, “Well I am particularly proud of this because I’ve been a single mom for a long time and if you work hard you can make your dreams come true” in reference to the girl’s ambitions. The Mother was surprised, smiled and said, “Oh wow, that’s wonderful, good job! I admire you!”.
A lady driving a Porsche who looks like she just came from the country club admires and envies me. Heh. WTF? I just got off food stamps a little while ago and she wants for her kids what my kids have. She didn’t know my story, she didn’t know my kids are on scholarship, it didn’t matter, my kids did the work and I vowed to make it work. She didn’t need to know that. I don’t want her to know that, it doesn’t matter anymore. I kind of wished I hadn’t told her I was a single mom but it was in reference to no matter the obstacles, little girl, you can achieve big things.
I was fighting back tears after she left and I gathered my reusable shopping bags from the car. I truly felt blessed. It was a sign. I know I did the right thing for my kids, and continue to do so. I have great riches in the form of great children. It’s all about perspective. Perhaps I had a sob story a while ago, but overall I am truly blessed. All the hardship seems to vanish now. I’m feeling less of a need to talk about it. That’s why my second book has been put on hold. I don’t know if I want to keep telling more of the same story. Perhaps I’ll keep tuned in to the Universe to figure out what to do on that. I will be sitting tirelessly next to the receiver, spinning dials to get a signal… “Tune in Tokyo”.